Monday, June 27, 2011

Communication - the cornerstone of a relationship

Communication is one of the main ingredients to a beautiful and healthy relationship. To communicate is to exchange your thoughts, feelings, beliefs, critiques and other comments with another person. Without having such an exchange, a relationship will live in silence and soon drown in that silence, until there is no longer any kind of connection between the two of you. This is one of the biggest reasons a relationship ends and also a reason why some are lead to making bad decisions.

Good communication is not just about being able to talk, but being able to listen. Being a good listener does not just mean waiting for your turn to talk, but really taking in the words your partner is sharing with you. As you receive those words, you should also understand the emotions in those words and the body language that goes along with them. If you do not pay close attention, you might miss the meaning in the words that are being said and the body language that is being presented with them.

Constant defensiveness is another way to lack good communication. If you or your lover constantly get offended by what the other says, then either one of you are not choosing your words too wisely, not listening very well, or not respecting each other’s opinion. All three of those are communication no-no’s. If you tend to get defensive as an instant first response, make an effort to stop and really listen to what your partner has said to you. Hearing and listening are different. If you only hear, you can turn those words into anything your mind tells you to, but if you listen, you will really understand the meaning your partner had behind those words. If you have a defensive partner, help him or her by asking them what offended them so much. Repeat your words and explain what you meant so they can get a better visual.

With good communication skills on both of your parts, your relationship can be stronger than you ever hope for!