To be a kid is certainly the best time
of your life. It is especially the innocence of a child that is the source of
many kids' jokes. Here are my five favorites.
1. Count vs. Talk
Sitting opposite a little girl in the
train, a man asks her, "You are so cute. How old are you?"
She holds up four fingers.
The man repeats his question and again
she holds up four fingers.
"How many is that," he asks,
"can't you talk?"
"Yes I can. Can't you count?"
2. Emptiness
Six-year old Mary comes home from school
complaining that she has stomach ache.
Her mother tells her that it is
because her stomach is empty but she will feel better once she has something in
it.
She gives Mary a healthy snack and
some juice and sure enough, she feels better!
Later on, during the afternoon, their
Reverend drops in for a visit and while they are talking, he tells her mother
that he had a headache all day.
Then Mary pipes in, "It is
because your head is empty. You'd feel better if you had something in it."
3. Must I Eat Spinach?
A five-year old girl is refusing to
eat her spinach.
Her mother says, "Eat up your
spinach darling, and you will grow up to be wise and beautiful."
The little girl thinks about this for
a while, looks her mother up and down and then innocently asks, "Didn't
they have spinach when you were young, mother?"
4. Not Now, Please!
A woman is trying to get the last bit
of tomato sauce out of the bottle when the phone rings. Her six-year old
daughter answers the phone, "Oh, hello Reverend. Mommy can't come to the
phone right now, she's hitting the bottle," and she puts the phone down!
5. Tooth Fairy
After losing another tooth, Jimmy
became more curious about the mysterious tooth fairy.
Finally deriving a conclusion, he came
right out and asked his mother, "Mom, are you the tooth fairy?"
Assuming he was old enough to hear the
truth, she replied, "Yes Jimmy, I am."
Jimmy seemed to take this news quite
well.
However, as he headed for the door, he
slowly turned back toward his mother with a curious look on his face and said,
"Wait a minute mom. How do you get into the other kids' houses?"
