You have met Mr. Wonderful and you are on cloud nine. He is just what the doctor ordered. Handsome as they come, charming as hell and so very chivalrous that it makes your heart wobble just to think of the awesome ways in which he chugs at your being. Really, you can find nothing wrong no matter how unflinching the scrutiny you put him through.
He not only knows the important details of your life, but also remembers the names of your best friends and their sun signs. At this stage if you ask me, there definitely seems to be great potential. Maybe it is much too early to tell if this is really Mr. Wonderful or Mr. Fantastic or whatever name you choose to give him. It sounds like you have found someone great.
But does Mr. Wonderful bring out the Miss Wonderful in you? Do your best qualities seem to shine when he is around? Do you feel all warm and cared for just thinking about him, even when he is not there? More importantly, when you think about your future, is he in the picture? And more significantly, are you in the same picture with him?
Let me tell you about the first Mr. Wonderful of my life. The last but one year of college and he walked into my shy, cloistered life like a breath of bold sunshine. All the girls swooned when he was around. His was the wrist on which sparkled the maximum number of Rachis as well. Was not exactly good-looking, certainly nowhere near the image of that bone-melting Mills and Boon type of hero I was enamoured of.
But he wore spectacles that made him look awesomely intelligent, spoke about other brainy guys like Freud and Camus almost as if he had played marbles with them. And I, poor me, from a strict convent background, was most impressed by the sensible way he spoke about things like sex and sensuality. When we walked into restaurants he would pull up chairs for the ladies to sit on and insist on paying the bill.
I was just so bowled over by him that I believed I was the luckiest girl in the world because he had deigned to call me 'his girl'. Lord, that hint of possessiveness just took my breath away. My most informed friend from a co-educational school educated me on how to recognize whether this was the perfect relationship. She said, do you feel a kind of electric current running through you when he looks into your eyes? (I could not tell for sure but there was something there of course that was different from the way I felt when my girl friends exchanged looks with me).
Chemistry is just the foundation you require to build a great relationship. Then you add some trust, communication and respect, a dollop of humour and romance and you're set on the course of a lasting relationship. And try to remember, if he’s not the one, its okay. Someone better will come along. Youthful romantic love is always a win-win situation!
What my friend did not tell me was that when Mr. Wonderful decides you are not his Miss Wonderful anymore, it can prove to be a gut-wrenching experience for you. Just because someone wipes out your name from the slate of his life, it is not that you cannot feel angry and used, you won't feel the loss and you can't cease to stop berating yourself for being such a dumb fool. You feel all of it and worse. It is the loneliest point of your life till then.
But time, the master healer comes along and you live and you learn. My advice to women let down by the Mr. Wonderful in their lives is to remember that there will lonely moments, nights and things you miss about that person. But do not let the emptiness fool you. That wasn't real love.
Besides, he just wasn't worth you. Now it is time to pick yourself up and come up with a game plan to deal with the next chapter of your life! Tomorrow is always another day, isn't it?
By Sarathy
