The power of Positive Thinking

Is your glass half-empty or half-full? How you answer this age-old question about positive thinking may reflect your outlook on life, your attitude toward yourself, and whether you're optimistic or pessimistic and it may even affect your health.

Here's how you can learn positive thinking skills:

Positive thinking doesn't mean that you keep your head in the sand and ignore life's less pleasant situations. Positive thinking just means that you approach the unpleasantness in a more positive and productive way. You think the best is going to happen, not the worst.

Positive thinking often starts with self-talk. Self-talk is the endless stream of unspoken thoughts that run through your head every day. These automatic thoughts can be positive or negative. Some of your self-talk comes from logic and reason. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that you create because of lack of information.

If the thoughts that run through your head are mostly negative, your outlook on life is more likely pessimistic. If your thoughts are mostly positive, you're likely an optimist someone who practices positive thinking.

The health benefits of positive thinking

Health benefits that positive thinking may provide include:

• Increased life span
• Lower rates of depression
• Lower levels of distress
• Greater resistance to the common cold
• Better psychological and physical well-being
• Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease
• Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress
• Practicing positive self-talk will improve your outlook. When your state of mind is generally optimistic, you're able to handle everyday stress in a more constructive way. That ability may contribute to the widely observed health benefits of positive thinking.

By Danie de Villiers - Freelance Writer

Love Improves Our Mental Health

Love has many physical benefits, but it would seem that men and women who are in a relationship get lots of mental health benefits too. In New Zealand a team at the University of Otago examined 1,000 people. They found that people who had been in a relationship for longer than five years were less likely to be depressed and attempt suicide. Other studies have found similar findings, stating that married people report lower levels of depression and distress. 

Apparently married men are also half as likely to commit suicide as single men, and one third as likely as divorced men. Perhaps the phrase “you’re driving me crazy” should no longer be used in reference to your partner?

How to take control of your life in easy steps

In our busy, hectic lifestyle, it often seems like there's not enough time to do everything you want in a day. All you need is 5 minutes a day to stop and smell the roses.

1. Make your bed. Starting off each day with this small ritual can help create a calm environment for you in your bedroom. Many people benefit from making this modest step part of their routines. By checking it off your to-do list first thing, you've got one less thing to worry about for the rest of the day.

2. Pack a snack. Before you head out the door in the morning, go into the kitchen and grab a fruit or a healthy snack This way, when the cravings strike later during the day, you won't be reaching for a bag of chips or a candy bar from the vending machine out of convenience.

3. Clear your desk. You may not be able to overhaul your closet in five minutes, but you can manage to tidy your desk at work. From stray papers to scattered coffee mugs, clutter can make you lose focus and curb productivity. Decluttering your environment and you may let you feel lighter on the inside and more motivated to concentrate on the task at hand.

4. Pump up the music. Several studies have found that listening to music can help lower blood pressure, reduce stress, and boost mood. The right music has the power to change your attitude.

5. Sniff a lemon. For a quick de-stressing trick, turn to your sense of smell for help. Japanese researchers found that linalool; a substance found in lemons, has anti-inflammatory properties and may reduce the flight-or-fight stress response. Other scents like basil, juniper, and lavender have also been found to lower stress. 

6. Stretch. You don't have to be a yogi to benefit from light stretching. Lift your arms above your head at your desk. Or better yet, stretch your legs by walking outside. Stretching can help improve your circulation and flexibility, and may help ease the tight muscles that accompany stress.

7. Meditate. Try meditation and deep breathing to relax and turn your mind off. You don't need any special equipment to practice meditation. Find a comfortable position in a chair or on the floor. Meditating on a daily basis, even just for a few minutes, has been shown to fight depression and ease stress.

8. Keep a diary. Take a minute every day to write down several things you're thankful for, whether they're big or small things. It's easy to vent about weather, traffic, or job woes, but complaining brings negative energy along with it. Being thankful for what you have can make you appreciate all the positives in your life.

9. Turn off your electronics. Just because we live in a wired world doesn't mean you need to stay connected every minute of every single day. Staring at computer screens and electronics all day long can zap your energy and encourage inactivity.

10. You must learn to prioritize. Make a list and finish your most dreaded duties first to avoid the anxiety caused by stalling. Make a list and check off each task as you complete it. At the end of the day, a list of accomplishments is a great visual reminder of how productive you were.

Are You Depressed?

If you experience five or more of these symptoms for more than 2 weeks, or they’re severe enough to interfere with your daily routine, seek professional help:

• A persistent sad, anxious, or empty mood
• Sleeping too little or too much
• Reduced appetite and weight loss or increased appetite and weight gain
• Loss of interest or pleasure in activities once enjoyed
• Restlessness or irritability
• Persistent physical symptoms that don’t respond to treatment
• Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
• Fatigue or loss of energy
• Feeling guilty, hopeless, or worthless
• Thoughts of death or suicide

Remember, stress management is important in fighting depression. 

Women and Mental Health Conditions

For women, the most common forms of mental ill health are stress, tiredness, and depression.

Women and Stress

When there is too much pressure on us, we become irritable and physically tense. Pain in the neck, shoulders or lower back, headaches, dizziness and tiredness are some of the signs of stress. We experience extra stress when more than one important event or crisis takes place at the same time. A crisis such as the death of someone close to you, losing your job or getting divorced will cause a lot of stress. Various health disciplines give advice about how to deal with stress. Most suggest a combination of exercise and healthy eating with rest and relaxation. They all caution us against setting our standards too high and trying to be perfect – or, as women so often do, trying to be everything to everybody.

When you are experiencing stress, it is important to find out exactly what is causing it. If you do not resolve the root problem, the stress will continue. Discuss your problems with a trusted friend or in a group. You might also consider using the services of mental health workers.

Women and Tiredness

Many women are overtired because they have to cope with so much as the main caregivers of society. The double shift (working away from home during the day and at home during evenings) also takes its toll. Too much stress affects the body’s immune system, with the result that we feel tired all the time and get sick often. Poor diet also contributes to high fatigue levels. Tiredness is the body’s way of calling for help.

To address tiredness, it is important to try and find out what causes it. Try to pinpoint what is bothering you in your personal life. At the same time, you should eat, sleep, and rest well. Try to do interesting things that make you feel good - join a support group or learn a new skill.

Women and ‘Nerves’

For centuries, women have complained of suffering from their ‘nerves’ – a term used to describe stress, tiredness, and depression. For some people, ‘nerves’ include physical symptoms such as tiredness and weakness. Others experience ‘nerves’ as an emotional state. ‘Nerves ‘mean different things to different people, but the condition almost always goes together with feelings of powerlessness and lack of control.

Sometimes people use the term ‘nerves’ to refer to serious mental illness, but the vast majority of people who feel they suffer from their ‘nerves’ are not mentally ill. They are usually in situations, which almost anyone would find difficult. If a woman says, ‘I am suffering from my nerves’; she is talking about the difficulties she faces in a way that is socially acceptable.

So in some ways, to suffer from ‘nerves’ may get you out of difficult situations. ‘Nerves’ are an example of what an anthropologist has called ‘the weapons of the weak’. The problem with using a weapon of the weak is that it will not change your situation or resolve problems in the long run. People tend to take those who say that they suffer from their ‘nerves’ less seriously.

What is needed is for all people who suffer from ‘nerves’ who are stressed, worried, exhausted or upset, to be given support  to talk about the real problems they face and to gain more control  over their lives. Achieving this goal depends on the kinds of relationships and support we build into our society.

Women and Depression

Most people experience difficulties in life: sometimes we feel happy, at other times we are sad or dissatisfied with ourselves and with life. It is quite natural to feel sad when something upsetting happens. However, when you feel stressed and tired all the time, it is important to act. Visit a health worker to get advice and check that you have not developed an illness. When stress does not go away, you may become depressed .People who feel powerless and trapped often experience depression. They feel sad and worried, but also angry with themselves, with their loved ones and with their circumstances. Sometimes they feel so frustrated and desperate that they consider taking their own lives.

Many women lack confidence and self-esteem, and feel they have no control over their lives. These feelings can contribute towards depression, which is the most common mental health problem among women. Here are some of the signs of depression:

·         You withdraw from people around you and from things that you usually enjoy.

·         You are irritable and see things in a negative light

·         You are constantly unhappy and cry easily

·         You feel guilty and blame yourself easily

·         You feel hopeless and despairing

·         Your work becomes less important

·         You no longer care about your appearance

·         You have little energy and are always tired - even when you wake up in the morning

·         You find it difficult to concentrate – you start things but rarely finish them

·         You sleep  a lot less of more than usual

·         You eat very little or a lot more than usual

·         You lose interest in sex

Sometimes depression can be dealt with by talking your problems through with a friend, in a group or with a mental health worker. However, it sometimes becomes so severe that you also need to take medicine so that you can start to function better. Medication should be combined with counselling, where you share problems with a mental health worker to find ways of getting extra support and dealing better with your situation.

Depression is often not understood. People with depression often feel judged and this makes their recovery even more difficult. As one sufferer says, ‘People expect you to snap out of it, but I couldn’t’. So people with depression are often unwilling to admit they have a problem, or they use euphemisms such as ‘a breakdown’ ‘or ‘nerves’. As in any other illness, eating well, exercise, relaxation and rest are important. These together with expressing yourself and talking your problems through form part of many therapies. Life- skills training, which empowers us, helping us to express ourselves better and to resolve conflict, is also helpful.

Woman to Woman

www.dan-the-bookkeeper.co.za